1 Thessalonians 5:18   give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

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Parenting on Purpose

What kind of parent are you? Are you the Authoritarian or the Push-over?

I was reading an excerpt of this speech the other day in a book, very interesting read!! Now this isn’t from a parent but from the educators. I work at a school so sometimes I can see how educators might have to deal with parents who just want to make their children happy and have good self-esteem and what not. But as you read this speech, think of yourself, the PARENT, and ask yourself how much you care? Are you lying to your own children through your parenting style?


The Speech the Graduates Didn’t Hear
JACOB NEUSNER—Brown University
We the faculty take no pride in our educational achievements with you. We have prepared
you for a world that does not exist, indeed, that cannot exist. You have spent four years
supposing that failure leaves no record. You have learned at Brown that when your work goes poorly, the painless solution is to drop out. But starting now, in the world to which you go, failure marks you. Confronting difficulty by quitting leaves you changed. Outside Brown, quitters are no heroes.

With us you could argue about why your errors were not errors, why mediocre work
really was excellent, why you could take pride in routine and slipshod presentation. Most of
you, after all, can look back on honor grades for most of what you have done. So, here grades can have meant little in distinguishing the excellent from the ordinary. But tomorrow, in the world to which you go, you had best not defend errors but learn from them. You will be ill-advised to demand praise for what does not deserve it, and abuse those who do not give it.

For four years we created an altogether forgiving world, in which whatever slight effort
you gave was all that was demanded. When you did not keep appointments, we made new
ones. When your work came in beyond the deadline, we pretended not to care.
Worse still, when you were boring, we acted as if you were saying something important.
When you were garrulous and talked to hear yourself talk, we listened as if it mattered. When you tossed on our desks writing upon which you had not labored, we read it and even responded, as though you earned a response. When you were dull, we pretended you were smart. When you were predictable, unimaginative, and routine, we listened as if to new and wonderful things. When you demanded free lunch, we served it. And all this why?
Despite your fantasies, it was not even that we wanted to be liked by you. It was that we
did not want to be bothered, and the easy way out was pretense: smiles and easy Bs.

It is conventional to quote in addresses such as these. Let me quote someone you’ve never
heard of: Professor Carter A. Daniel, Rutgers University (Chronicle of Higher Education,
May 7, 1979):

“College has spoiled you by reading papers that don’t deserve to be read,
listening to comments that don’t deserve a hearing, paying attention even to
the lazy, ill-informed, and rude. We had to do it, for the sake of education. But
nobody will ever do it again. College has deprived you of adequate
preparation for the last fifty years. It has failed you by being easy, free, forgiving, attentive, comfortable, interesting, unchallenging fun. Good luck

That is why, on this commencement day, we have nothing in which to take much pride.
Oh, yes, there is one more thing. Try not to act toward your co-workers and bosses as you
have acted toward us. I mean, when they give you what you want but have not earned, don’t abuse them, insult them, act out with them your parlous relationships with your parents. This too we have tolerated. It was, as I said, not to be liked. Few professors actually care whether or not they are liked by peer-paralyzed adolescents, fools so shallow as to imagine professors care not about education but about popularity. It was, again, to be rid of you. So go, unlearn the lies we taught you. To Life!
Neusner, Jacob. “The Speech the Graduates Didn’t Hear.” Daily Harold 12 June 1983.


As educators we are told we can’t be the student’s best friends, they have plenty of those. Why? Because when we give them the grade they actually deserve, they aren’t willing to remain friends. If your child is unhappy, let this be a signal of growth (if the unhappiness is coming from punishment for a wrongdoing or you not heeding his/her wishes). Happiness is based on Happenstance. When you allow your children to learn and grow, they establish true self-worth! I’d rather my child have a lifetime of self-worth than a weeks worth of self-esteem.

If I fail your child in class, it’s not because I’m a mean teacher and dislike your child. It is because I care enough to tell your child he or she isn’t trying hard enough. I WANT your child to succeed and I hope that you can use this moment to teach your child as well. I would do it for any of my 3 children. If they got an F, or an A, I am pretty sure they would know WHY they got that grade… as parents we simply need to resist the urge to think they can’t think for themselves.

When I ask my Oldest son Micah to go to his room for something he did wrong, and then enter his room to talk about what happened, he has no problem telling me what he has done wrong when we have a conversation about it. I mean a CONVERSATION, not me yelling at him or punishing him, I mean an eye to eye, heart to heart conversation. He has no problem telling me that he knew it was wrong for him to do. He has no problem telling me what kind of punishment he should receive for such behavior, and he pretty much nails it every time. I’m not going to lie, we’ve negotiated his punishment once or twice, with reason, but i can see in my child’s eyes that he truly understands me and is sincere in what he is telling me. I am sure he is truly sorry for his actions. I have seen a HUGE difference between this method and the SWIFT and Harsh punishment and then forgetting about it in 10 minutes.

As parent’s we need to take the time and invest it into our children, we might think…oh well when they are older they will understand a little more and I will explain it a little more. Please don’t do this. Start when your children can talk. Use words they understand and throw in words they don’t. In no time they will understand those big words too. You have no idea the capacity of a child’s mind.

Well I have ranted and raved, and all I can hope is that as God’s word says, you will ~~ “train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it”

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Date Night!!!

Woah! My husband and I will be celebrating 7 years of marriage not to far from now. I am soooo excited to just be able to go on a date night with him. For all you couples out there very much in love, I found this really neat site with 50 fun and cheap date Ideas.

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My 5th Grade Art Class’ project

My 5th Grade art class made these. I got the idea, thanks to Holly V. from Lines, Dot’s and Doodles   These turned out great. They got a lot of compliments and the kids did a really good job and actually took their time. 2 weeks time actually…. b/c of spring break in between. I only get them about 45 minutes, 30 really by the time everyone gets seated and they get started after instruction. minus about 5-10 minutes of clean up time if they are cutting or gluing. We started out with tracing the hands and feet on a LARGE paper. make sure feet and hands fit with plenty of space between the hands. Students then drew an oval shape for their head. Small….not proportionate to the hands and feet of course for the 3-D effect.

Faces were drawn proportionate to the actual human head…or as close as possible. I had students make sure they didn’t draw themselves to “cartoonish” real eyes, 3 part nose, nostrils, plump lips or open-mouthed.  Then, details like lines in their hands and the bottom design of their shoes. Then we stepped through drawing the body. leg lines started from the bottom edge of the shoe, same with the hand…connected to the shoulders. Body drawn small as if far-away….the more to the center of the body, the smaller b/c body is bent back in the illusion. I forgot to emphasize the emotion of falling through space. They should be drawing themselves with a scared face. Details on clothing, colored in, then cut out and paste to a larger black paper decorated with “space” items…. allow for creativity. I had a kid put a cow with an astronaut helmet, another put objects in space just for fun, random but funny… a potato, a pizza, a man fishing off the edge of one of his planets. Have fun!

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Oh my gosh I bawled like a baby when I read this… Just your friendly tear-jerking reminder to spend A LOT of time with your kids while they are young because they grow up way too fast!

Slow Down, Daddy!

“Slow down, Daddy, I just can’t run that fast!”
The little voice calls out to you, as you walk on past.
“Wait for me, Daddy, I’m trying hard to follow you…”
Walking closely in your footsteps – where are you leading to?

“Hey Daddy, hey Daddy, come take a look at me!”
The call goes on unheeded; too caught up in your thoughts to see.
“Come over here, Daddy, can you stop a minute and play?”
The little voice laughs aloud, but you are distracted by your day.

“Oh Daddy, guess what we learned in class today.
Jesus loves me, this I know. And then we knelt to pray…
Tell me Bible stories about Jesus – I really love those parts…
I got saved today, Daddy, Jesus now lives in my heart!”

“I love you, Daddy, I thought of you all day long…
We had so much fun – but I miss you when you’re gone.
Good night, Daddy, it’s been a long, long, day.
I’m so sleepy, Daddy, but I love it when you pray.”

“Come play with me, Daddy,” the words echo in your ear,
As you gaze upon your sleeping child, the one you love so dear.
“It’s been so long, Daddy, I was waiting for you to come home to me.”
And you vow to be there tomorrow, to be the Daddy you need to be.

For Father’s Day
May 30th/06
Jerry Bouey

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I just don’t get it… Bavarian Crochet

So am I missing something here or what? I found this amazing crochet pattern and I just really don’t get it. Please tell me what I am missing…

Super Amazing

So In the link above it gives the tutorial step by step but somewhere after the third picture I am SOOOO lost. Please! Someone help me! Its such an amazing beautiful way of crocheting but i just can’t seem to figure it out. I even read the PDF version and NOPE just not getting it. =(

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100 things to do with my kiddos

In no particular order…

1. Go to the zoo

2. Visit a farm

3. Go on a hike

4. Play with kittens or puppies

5. Catch a frog

6. Make a gigantic mess

7. Help clean up a gigantic mess

8. Master the monkey-bars

9. Swing high up into the sky all by themselves

10. Try ice-skating

11. Go sledding

12. Make a snow-man

13. Blow bubbles

14. Plant seeds and watch them grow

15. Have a pillow fight

16. Jump on a big bed

17. Jump on a trampoline or in a bounce house

18. Hang out in a tent

19. Spend days at the beach

20. Build sandcastles

21. Go fishing

22. Go out on a boat

23. Play with blocks and puzzles

24. Read the classic picture books

25. Read a classic chapter book

26. Check out library books with their own library card

27. Get a passport

28. Carve a pumpkin

29. Hold a newborn baby (to see how much they’ve grown)

30. Love a special doll or stuffed animal

31. Bake cookies and cakes

32. Help plan their own birthday party

33. Go to the circus

34. Go to a museum on a quiet weekday

35. Play hide-and-seek

36. Play a board game

37. Do nothing whatsoever all day

38. Try a sport

39. Watch a sporting event

40. Learn to swim

41. Be tickled in hysterics

42. Paint and draw as much as desired

43. Have the use of scissors and glue

44. Display artworks and other creations around the house

45. Learn to use a camera (and keep an album of the results!)

46. Play with clay

47. Pick flowers

48. Climb a tree

49. Gaze at the moon and stars

50. Toast marshmallows

51. Learn to eat an ice-cream cone

52. Watch a sunset

53. Learn to write their own names

54. Learn their addresses and telephone numbers

55. Learn their parents’ full names

56. Set the table

57. Clear the table

58. Help wash the dishes

59. Learn to say their pleases and thank yous and excuse mes

60. Watch fireworks

61. Go to the ballet or theater or a puppet show

62. Put on a ballet or play or puppet show at home

63. Face paint

64. Dress up in costumes at will

65. Learn rhymes and poems and songs by heart

66. Have a dance party

67. Enjoy friends at preschool and at the park

68. Invite friends over to play

69. Get to know grandparents

70. Play with cousins

71. Become attached to a wonderful preschool teacher and/or babysitter

72. Learn the name of our president

73. Know the name of their town, state and country

74. Be familiar with a map of the world

75. Listen to music from many different ages and genres

76. Hear and learn words from a different language

77. Learn the difference between trash and recycling

78. Grow their own vegetables

79. Learn to ride a bike (or try!)

80. Take a road trip

81. Draw a self-portrait

82. Slurp alphabet soup

83. Learn to twirl spaghetti on a fork

84. Pick apples

85. Star in a home movie

86. Learn a magic trick

87. Try different hair-dos

88. Practice writing letters

89. Practice counting to 100

90. Make up stories

91. Send a letter

92. Receive a letter

93. Ride on a merry-go-round

94. Give away toys and books to less fortunate children

95. Learn the value of coins and bills

96. Keep a piggy bank

97. Try a musical instrument

98. Have a heartfelt wish granted

99. Have a heartfelt wish denied

100. Receive a million (make that a billion) heartfelt kisses and hugs from their parents!

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Just Sayin’

Sensitivity is a symptom of pride…Not sure I really agree with people who have dealt with past hurts taking it out on others by being so sensitive/ easily offended/ or touchy… As much as I love people I am taken back when people respond with offense to any little comment. What is your take….especially when it comes to racial matters? I understand people may have been done wrong in the past, but why am I personally to walk on eggshells for something I personally didn’t do? For example: As I waited for a parent of a student, one parent arrived for her daughter. I had the misfortune of mistaking which parent it was and the automatic response was attitude. She made it clear that she was another’s mother and there was ANOTHER family of the same color. Now, it was not at all what I meant…I was just being nice enough to wait with that student so she wasn’t charged $ for staying extra time at school. I had to seriously go out of my way to awkwardly explain what I meant or my intention. Had it been a person of any other race, I don’t believe I would have been meet with such animosity. =( Not at all my intention, It is my first year working there Full time and I have yet to meet ALL the parents in school.

What I don’t understand is why is there such a high sense of entitlement when we are a country with a huge variety of race. We have all endured our hardships and so have our ancestors. We should be peacemakers, especially those of us who have a personal relationship with the epitome of LOVE—God.

Proverbs 14:17 says:

A quick-tempered person does foolish things,
and the one who devises evil schemes is hated.


Matthew 5:9
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.

Just sayin’

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OOoh! So true!

How many times has this happened to you? You just start thinking about all the things wrong and how many things  need to get done…so on and so forth. It’s amazing how busy our minds can get while lying in bed…so much so that we can not rest our body. Then we get hit with the realization “Dude, you’re lying in bed about to go to sleep, what in the world are you going to do about it right now? Are you going to jump out of bed and get back to work on everyday issues that can wait until tomorrow?” Although i have never been an alcoholic I like the AA’s Serenity Prayer:

God, grant me the Serenity

to accept the things I cannot change,

courage to change the things I can,

and the wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time,

enjoying one moment at a time,

accepting hardship as the

pathway to Peace.

Taking, as He did, this sinful world

As it is, not as I would have it;

Trusting that He will make all things

right if I surrender to His will;

That I may be reasonably happy

in this life, and supremely happy

with Him in the next.



So very TruE!
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Letting Go

So I’ve had my eyes opened more to God’s love these past few months. Isn’t it amazing how God loves us SO UNCONDITIONALLY? I am in awe.

We as humans can be so quick to hold a grudge and so slow to let them go. I’ve had my share of let-downs, but in the end I realize- what good does it do me to hold on to that mess? SO many people hold on to things that only hurt themselves…the person that has done them wrong is long gone, living their own lives…probably even guilt free because they might not even remember or have put away what they have done (maybe even asked God for forgiveness) and yet we choose to still suffer from that moment or moments we were hurt. Like continually picking at a scab and never allowing it to heal.
God wants to heal us, help us…but he can’t do so if we constantly pick at those past hurts. God wants us to hand over our junk to him so we can be free…
There’s something I’ve learned and It’s been such an amazing gift from God……Letting GO!
Over the years it’s been easier and easier… you can choose to be a bowl or a strainer…. either holding everything (good and bad) or allowing all the bad to be strained out and learning from your circumstance and retaining the good.
Make your choice today. God wants to protect you from anymore pain! He wants you to be able to dance in the rain knowing God is your umbrella protecting you from harm. Knowing he is your just judge and will bring Justice where it’s due. Knowing that everyone is ultimately in need of HIM—yes even your wrong-doer. Learning to be sympathetic in every situation! Let Go! Release yourself in every instance and give everything up to your Father in heaven who truly loves YOU!!!!!
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